repeat...

don't you get tired when people repeat the same thing over and over again? don't you feel odd and just want to shout at then tell them you already understand? they just wouldn't stop and they have to repeat it again...it seems, for me, that they don't trust you...that they can't be satisfied with what you can do...it's just frustrating to think that they, think, that they know you enough and yet they don't trust you enough...so io just thought that what if, I repeated the same mistake to them...I don't know what will they feel if they were the one in my situation... Sometimes, I think did they really go through this much? Do they think it's not enough? not enough to prove to them that I value the trust that they give me but if they can't see it then so do I... If they can't value who I am then so be it...I won't value their trust either...I think they just simply don't understand me...it's really simple... it's just they don't trust me and they won't want to... it's just they don't trust me and they won't want to... Hey, didn't I just repeat that? isn't it irritating, to repeat it all? over and over and over and over again? would you repeat that?

who am i?

well basically i'm nobody... a simple obedient girl, smart, yes, i am smart but not smart enough for anybody...they say i'm jolly but that's what they say...that isn't me...that is what they think i am... i know i am dumb for starting this blog because probably i'm only able to update once every two months after may...but i just felt like writing something that came off my heart not my notebook... i guess this is what i am...i'm 11 turning 12 soon...can you believe i'm only 11? well, i can't either... hmmmmm....anyway, i'm studying of course, in what i can say a nice school...nice enough because of dramatic over reacting teachers... i can't imagine someone as nosy... they're hilarious! i am an average girl i can say...and i'm not yet a lady but i'm someone that is different...different from everbody...they always asked what they want...i want to be normal...i don't want to be a smart-girl everyone looked up to! i want to start from scratch...to start from nothing and work my way to the top! i didn't want to be like this! i never dreamed for it! yet, this is how i'm turning to be... i was supposed to write something off my notebook today but i guess i can't because it wouldn't make sense...enough about that i want to tell more... well, yeah i'm really in to writing i'm writing at 4 sites including this one and i don't have anybody reading my blogs so i guess it'll be okay...but if someone does i guess it is still okay...i don't know if i can be what you call a writer because i'm not good when i first started...i'll talk about writing in some other time! here's a picture on how will i be described...or that picure anyway.... that picture is what i describe as me...beautiful but a mask...they're black roses after all...the defiance of beauty yet melancholy...if you look at it it is beautiful but when you know its meaning it seems so painful...i'll see you! hmmm...diary?